The Plan

There are times in the course of human events when the human for whom the events are coursing is faced with identity forming moments. These moments shape how people will view us for the rest of our lives, or more jarringly, how we will view ourselves for the rest of our lives. I faced on of these moments this week. There are two roads that can that can be taken when one is faced with one of these moments (I would suggest taking the road less travelled by); one may dash heedlessly down the road of panic, or one may, with firm and confident step, stride down the road of courage. I was faced with one of these moments this past week. It was a moment when my identity as "a native English speaking person who is capable of teaching his or her language to Chinese children living in Taipei" hung in the balance. Of course, this is an essential part of anyone's identity, and we have all questioned how we would fare if we were forced to determine the matter once and for all, just as we have wondered whether, with a gun pointed at our faces, we would stand true to our belief or we would cave and don that Florida Gators jersey. Parent demos were this past week, and I knew going in that this go a long way in determining whether or not I was capable of teaching English here in Taipei. Of course, you are asking which road I took. Did I panic or did I stand strong? Well, I did neither; I cheated and pulled out the magic lesson plan.

The magic lesson plan was shown me by a coworker at school. He took me down to a dark cave and initiated me into The Circle of the White Moon English Teacher's Society. As a member, I was given this magic lesson plan. This lesson plan contains all the elements that please those who need to be pleased. All I needed to do was to follow the plan and success was guaranteed. That was easier said that done, however, for I forgot to factor in the dark power of nerves. They attacked, causing me to say things like "Good morning, class" at 4:00 o'clock in the afternoon. These wicked powers did not stop there, but pressed on causing me to forget key elements of the magic lesson plan's incantation (i.e. activities in the plan). It didn't help that I, thinking that it would impress the society, made significant changes and adaptations to the magic lesson plan in order to have it fit more to my teaching style. This is good in theory, but it requires that one first actually have a teaching style. Thus, I wound up confused as to what I was doing at times. "Let's play a game, kids...No, wait, let's read now...Hold on, that comes later...let's work on some spelling...Um, let's all go home." What these evil nerves did not take into account, though, is the fact that I cut a mighty pathetic figure when I am confused and nervous. I somehow compel sympathy from all who view these spectacles. With a great tide of sympathy sweeping o'er the room, then, I was able to get past the demos.

On a more serious note, I would like to note that I really am getting to like my kids a lot. They are great. I have a good job, and am looking forward to getting better at it. My kids make the job easy to like.

I got my health insurance card this week too. Taiwan has a nationalized health insurance program. Believe it or not, it actually works really well. You can do whatever you want with that information. What is really important about me receiving my insurance card was the revelation that came from realizing I was born in 1971. The Chinese have a different calendar than the one that we use in the West. They are eleven years behind us. My insurance card states that I was born eleven years before I was actually born. At first this is disheartening, as it would seem that I am already 39 years old. Then, I realized that I was looking at the problem from the wrong direction. Right now it is 1999 here in Taiwan. This means that I am now living eleven years ago. I feel like I get to go back to when I was 17. This explains why, as I mentioned in an earlier blog, the people here all look so young. They are all living back in time. So for those of you who want to turn back the clock a little bit, you should come visit me here. I would only suggest this line of action, however, for those of you who are over the age of eleven. I am not sure what would happen to a five year old child who chanced to venture this way.

(For any philosophers who happen upon this blog, I am well aware that I played fast and loose with the term "identity" in the first part. What I am not sure of is why the heck you're reading this blog.)